March 23, 2006

Post Time......

So, the holiday has ended and the hangovers have subsided, but many have asked, "If it's truly St. Patrick's Month as you claim, why have all the lame Irish jokes subsided????"

"Well, " he says, "It's mainly because I don't wish to wear out my welcome......"

Yes, believe it or not, some people actualy get tired of Irish jokes.......These people are typically of inferior mental capabilities, but being the diverse culture we are these days, we can't pick on stupid people for being stupid......

(Damn.....I wasn't supposed to be so insensitive........I do, really, I'm sorry....I did not mean to imply that people who did not enjoy Irish humor were stupid......but, if you stop to think about it, they are either stupid or merely daft.........

There now, I hope I made you feel better.......

Let's test......if you find this funny.......than you are cured, and you are no longer a subject of the Queen......Hip-Hip-Hurray!!!!!

A Belfast newspaper once reported the launching of an aircraft carrier and recorded:

'The Duchess smashed the bottle against the bow and amid the applause of the crowd she slid on her greasy bottom into the sea.'

A black, black night it was as Mick made his way homeward from the pub. Suddenly he heard a small voice crying for help and so, full of Guinness and good will to all men, he followed the sound 'til he came across the small figure of a leprechaun with his foot caught under a large stone. Mick freed the green-clad little fellow, helped him gently to his feet and made sure all was well.
"Good sir," said the leprechaun, bowing stiffly and low, "I am in your debt and wish to repay yer kindness. I would deem it a favor if ye'd accept three fairy wishes."
"Shure now that would be foine," said Mick.
"Make a wish then," said the little man, "and whatever ye want, 'twill be granted."
"Oi wish Oi had a bottle of stout," said Mick.
No sooner were the words spoken than a bottle appeared in Mick's hand. Gently he unscrewed the top and supped the bottle.
"Sir," interrupted the leprechaun, "I don't mean to be rushing ye, but I must get on and ye still have two more wishes to make."
"Well," said Mick, "Oi wish this bottle would never be empty."
"Done," said the manikin.
Mick had another swig and another and, sure enough, after each the bottle would replenish itself.
"Glory be," said Mick, dancing a small jig and supping some more.
"And what's your third wish?" the leprechaun inquired politely.
"Shure now," said Mick, waving his magic bottle, "Oi'll have another one of these."

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