March 18, 2010

March the 17th, sleep the 18th......

If only it were possible.....but with kids and work the option of sleeping off a wonderful night of celebrating is not to be......but, I will survive. There are only 364 days until I do it all over again..... :)

The Donegal definition of a hangover: "Something occupying a head that wasn't used the night before."

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The taxi passenger tapped O’Malley, the driver, on the shoulder to ask him a question. O’Malley screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath, and stopped centimeters from a shop window.

For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then, O’Malley said, "If you would please be so kind as to not ever do that again. You scared the bejeebers out of me!"

The passenger apologized and said, "I didn't realize that a little tap would scare you so much."

O’Malley replied, "Think nothing of it, it's not really your fault. Today is me first day driving a cab. I've been driving a hearse for the last 25 years."

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The English businessman was sadly born without ears. Although successful in business, this problem did annoy him greatly. One day he needed to hire a new manager for his company. His secretary had set up three interviews for him, with an Italian, a Frenchman, and an Irishman.

The first interview was with the Italian. He knew everything he needed to know and was very interesting. At the end of the interview, the Englishman asked him, "Do you notice anything different about me?"

"Why, yes, I couldn't help but notice that you have no ears," was the reply.

The Englishman did not appreciate his candor and threw him out of the office.

The second interview was with the Frenchman and he was even better than the first. The Englishman asked the same question: "Do you notice anything different about me?"

"Well," stammered the Frenchman, "you have no ears."

The Englishman again got upset and chucked him out in a rage.

He was wary of the last interview with the young Irishman. Sean, who had recently earned his degree from Trinity College in Dublin, was the best of the bunch. He was smart, handsome, and he seemed to have better business sense than the first two put together. The Englishman was anxious, but went ahead and asked the young man the same question: "Do you notice anything different about me?"

Much to his surprise, Sean answered, "Yes, you wear contact lenses, don't you?" The Englishman was shocked and realized this was an incredibly observant person. "How in the world did you know that?" he asked.

Sean fell off his chair laughing hysterically and replied, "Well, it's pretty hard to wear glasses with no freaking ears!"

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